Sunday, June 07, 2009

Dear Irritating Vegetable Truck Guy,

Dear Irritating Vegetable Truck Guy,

I've got a bit of an issue that I'm hoping we can come to an agreement about. I know you've gotta make a living just like everyone else and I know that you do this by selling vegetables and fruit in my neighborhood from your truck.

That's totally cool and I've got no problem with that. I think once or twice I even bought some tangerines from you (and they were pretty good too). I don't even mind you blaring your recorded sales pitch on your loudspeaker. For half an hour at a time. Hey, I worked in sales once (telemarketing and door to door commercial carpet cleaning), so I know exactly how tough it can be sometimes. I can respect that too. I mean, everyone's gotta make a living, right? So live and let live I say.

The problem I have is the hour of day that you blare your recorded sales pitch. I think we can both safely say that nobody wants to roll out of bed and shop for vegetables at 7:30 AM on Saturday or Sunday morning. This is the second time this weekend alone you woke me trying to tempt me with your heaps of persimmons, radishes, cabbage or lettuce or baby tomatoes or whatever.

You've been blaring your loudspeaker at the whole neighborhood and I've watched you, nobody's buying your stuff that early (perhaps this is why you drive off at 8:15, after the whole neighborhood is awake). You see, the only thing a loudspeaker sells at an hour like this is resentment and hatred. Perhaps this is why most people in this town prefer to live on the 15th floor of an apartment building, where they can't hear people like you?

Hey, its OK, I understand you're a farmer. You get up early when your rooster crows and get hard to work on the farm before the sun rises. That's cool man. I respect that. But you've gotta respect us too. On weekends, us city slickers. don't want to get out of bed and shop for groceries until at least 9:30 or 10:00. If you show up at 9:30, I might even start buying stuff from you again, instead of getting angry about being woken up by your megahorn and boycotting you (as apparently the rest of the neighborhood has as well)