Ballet at the Bunka Centaa

I went to the "culture center" today to watch a bit of ballet with an English teacher I work with. Her twelve year old daughter was performing in the recital. The program consisted of numerous songs being performed by children of all ages. I got to see everything from little 4 year olds stomping around to middle and high school students whose performances were quite impressive.

They played all sorts of different songs. Not being a conosseiur, I could only recognize a couple songs from the Tchaikovsky's The Nutcracker and Swan Lake. They also performed to numerous songs by Japanese Pop artists, which were not so impressive. Some of the music was downright painful to hear.

It also turned out that the teacher I went with was part of the volunteer staff, and couldn't see me. I also misunderstood her explanation of the event, thinking it was going to be a whole big production, instead of a collection of performances set to the latest bubble gum pop.

No matter how sophisticated and urbane a modern man might be, can only take so much. I reached my limit after 50 minutes of 9 year olds in fluorescent tutus prancing around to something like this.

Fox News Memo

While I don't want to make this blog a showcase of my political views, I thought some people might find this interesting. A memo at Fox News, which claims to be "fair and balanced." In this memo, the Fox Senior Vice president says (presumably to reporters and staff) "lets be on the lookout for any statements from the Iraqi insurgents, who must be thrilled at the prospect of a Dem-controlled Congress."

Another Goofy Caption Contest

Haven't done a Caption Contest in awhile, so I figure we are long overdue! Post your captions here people!!

This particular picture comes from Biblehelp.org. Hope they don't mind me stealing their picture. What kind of a person am I anyways? Stealing silly pictures from a Bible website!

One of the brighter spots about my emerging fluency in Japanese is that I worry less about grammar, pronounciation, and listening skills, and more on other more interesting nuances, phrases, euphemisms and expressions. Things are still very frustrating for me at times, but I’m catching a lot of things with my ear I didn’t catch before. When speaking to an English teacher at one of my schools, I heard her use the phrase “hakoiri musume.” 箱入り娘This literally means something like “boxed daughter.” Hako means box. As I was not sure exactly what she meant, I made her explain it to me.

It means something like sheltered daughter. Picture an insulated lap child, somewhat naïve and ignorant about the ways of the world. She is a girl or a young woman who still lives at home with well-to-do over-protective parents. It came up in conversation when we were talking about overprotective parents. The teacher I was talking to mentioned a mutual acquaintance, and I had to laugh because I was about to ask about her. I can think of several other women I know who fit this category quite well. So for posterity and my own personal amusement, I have decided to list a couple other phrases I have picked up lately.

Goma o suru – ごまをするThis phrase literally means “do the sesame” or “grind the sesame.” When you eat tonkatsu (a fried pork dish with a sesame sauce) you have to grind the sesame seeds yourself. You grind them into a powder and then mix it with some goo. Outside of this context, it means something along the lines of flattery, especially in a flirtatious context. Someone who is overly flattering or complimentary might be accused of “grinding” or “softening” the sesame. This would also be the case if you were insincere or were less than honorable in your motives. I have never heard it used seriously.

Haraguroi –　腹黒いThis literally translates to black stomach. In more traditional Japanese culture, people held the notion that one’s ‘heart’ or ‘mind’ existed in one’s stomach. So the idea literally means that somebody has a dark, or evil soul. They may be smiling and happy on the surface, but they have a ‘dirty mind’ as it were.

Hashinoshita – 橋の下 I was joking around with some teachers and practicing the first word hakoirimusume (boxed daughter) and trying to gauge its usage and people’s reactions. I asked one teacher, whose son I know, if he has a boxed son. Hashinoshita was his response. It means “under the bridge” or homeless, abandoned and disowned. Its not too dissimilar from the English translation in the same context. He wasn't being very serious either.

Nekojita - This literally translates to "cat's tounge." Cats will not drink or eat anything if it is too hot, so Nekojita refers to a person who doesn't eat or drink anything too hot. So while everyone else has finished their coffee or tea, this person is waiting for it to become lukewarm.

Shopping with Brenden & Debbie

今日は須賀川市の松明あかしに行きました。松明あかしはとても面白い祭りです。毎年須賀川市であります。私の友達ブレンヂンさんは岩手県の花巻市から来ました。ブレンヂンさんは大学の同級生です。ときどき一緒に遊びました。放課後ではときどきパンケーキを一緒に食べました。
ブレンヂンさんは友達と一緒に郡山に来ました。デービーさんはアメリカの１年生ＡＥＴの先生です。岩手県の高校で働いています。

須賀川市のまつりに行きました。とても楽しかった！でも雨が降りました。


The following day I took Brenden & Debbie to a "recycle shop" near my house. We had tons of fun there, even though it is right near my house and I frequent the place. It might be considered the Japanese equivalent of Goodwill, except that people shop there for style, not for economic reasons. In fact, we noticed numerous imported used items from the USA that probably cost more than their newer counterparts that Americans buy domestically. Having only been in Japan just over 3 months, Debbie was far more cognizant of American purchasing power parity than Brenden and I. We saw used (very used) Letter Jackets from High Schools across the Midwest go for over 120 dollars. Used Starwars neckties were going for 30 dollars, when I could probably buy them new in Target for half the price. The first thing they say to avoid culture shock is not to compare. But sheesh.

I also decided to take a picture of Debbie & Brenden with the giant Pooh bear. For whatever reason, Japanese people (and young Japanese women in particular) are smitten with Pooh Bear. Finally I took them both to the Koriyama branch of the Northern Arizona University bookstore for some Lumberjack apparel. It was actually a store called “North Rim” where the guy carries new NAU t-shirts for around 50 USD. NAU tees were out of stock, but he did have ASU shirts on a clearance rack. Yeah, the Japanese know where its at. I had met the guy several times before. Being a foreigner, people easily remember me, so we made a bit of small talk. He asked me to teach him English. For free. Fat chance.

Sukagawa Fire Festival

Lying to the South of Koriyama, the sleepy little town of Sukagawa sprawls out into the rice fields of central Tohoku. While Sukagawa constitutes little more than a “suburb” of Koriyama, it is quite famous for its annual “Fire Festival.” Each year, thousands descend upon the town to commemorate the destruction of an ancient castle that once stood on a hill. Around 40 to 50 large towers are constructed to represent the castle. Standing 10 to 30 meters high, each tower is a heavy column filled with mostly hay and timber. At precisely six thirty, on Saturday night, they burn

While Brenden, Debbie and I spent the better part of the day worrying about precipitation ruining the festival, people were busy erecting the towers all day as the rain fell. We watched them finish hoisting the last two upon our arrival. Using extendable ladders, wooden poles, ropes, and pulleys, groups of uniformed festival volunteers shouted chants to synchronize and coordinate their efforts. Silence ensued for a short bit as several people shuffled around to prepare another lifting. As silence fell upon the audience shortly before the completion of this task, a cry penetrated the rain soaked darkness. A single lone voice from the swirling mass of uniforms shouted into the crowd,"HEY BRENT!!"
"Yeah?"
"Get a picture of this $＃イと!!"

Upon closer inspection, this particular individual had blonde hair, blue eyes, and an Australian accent.

Prior to coming, I had agreed to meet another friend named Kaori at the festival, a preschool teacher who I know from my local gym, Peare. She showed up with a friend from her preschool, and we all ate tonjiru as I made introductions. I was happy when she did show up, because they both had umbrellas that we could share, and we weren’t stuck with Brenden’s. But the rain kept pouring, and we all got wet despite the umbrellas. I felt sorry for Kaori’s friend Maiko, who was wearing girly sandals in the mud.

As we stood around making small talk, an army of little children filed past. The children were holding small wooden fishing poles, on the ends of which were suspended arcane glowing balls of fire. Police and firemen shouted to make way, as over two hundred children marched up the hill and into the area. The burning of the columns was soon imminent.

Following this, people started climbing tall ladders up the sides of the columns, holding large torches. Shoving them into the tops of the columns, they quickly descended as the pillars slowly smoldered in the rain, and then lit up the night in a spectacular display.

Words cannot describe the majestic flaming maelstrom blazing right in front of us. Smoke poured into the sky as the burning conflagration rose up to defy the endless rain falling against it. We watched until nearly all the pyres turned to crumbled masses of embers on the ground. Then we all went out to eat at an Izakaya (bar &grill).

To read Brenden's take, see his blog here.

Friends from Hanamaki

My old college buddy Brenden Pitt has been teaching English here in Japan for as long as I have. Faithful readers will recall my visit to Pittmeister’s town in September. Coming down from his post in Iwate in the North, Brenden brought his friend Debbie Wong along with him.

Both of them were excited to see the infamous Fire Festival in Sukagawa that takes place on Saturday. At first Brenden and his friend weren’t sure if they could come. But after sending them a picture of last year’s festival, they quickly vocalized unbridled enthusiasm. Living in a remote farming village in the North (their town is like Helena Montana), both were eager to go shopping and sip lattes in the urbane, cosmopolitan atmosphere of Koriyama.

Being fellow Lumberjacks, Brenden and I spent a lot of time talking about our old professors at Northern Arizona University, especially Dr. Wilson, and Dr. Foley. We had plenty of entertaining stories for Debbie.

Coming from San Francisco, Debbie is a first year teacher in Japan. She seemed very nice, and was quite patient as Brenden and I related story after story of our antics and tomfoolery at NAU and Flagstaff, Arizona. Sill being quite new to Japan, she wasn’t speaking very much Japanese yet. She still seems quite impressed with all the cultural and social differences here in Japan, as I probably was during my first year.

忘れ物 Multifarious Friday night

An atypical Friday night.

Getting home Friday, I discovered that Adoni, neighbor and fellow teacher from New York, was overly eager to “go for a drive” with me. I quickly discovered however, that she had forgotten to bring home the power cord from her laptop, and needed me to take her to her school and pick it up. Feeling especially generous, and not having any concrete plans that evening, I decided to help her out. She thanked me by taking me out to dinner.

The drive took about 40 minutes, so we had plenty of time to chat. She told me she loved most of the teachers and students, except for one English teacher she worked with. This man has apparently given her no end of grief. Upset about the Iraq war, and Adoni’s involvement (being an American), he apparently yelled at Adoni one day until she was nearly in tears. The Board of Education visited the school on Adoni’s behalf, and berated the man quite severely for several hours. She tells me things have improved since then, but he still has a screw loose and does nutty things every other day. We arrived at her school and I met some of the teachers she works with, but not this guy. It might have been an interesting conversation.

After dinner with Adoni, I met up with a friend at the local watering hole. While we were there, I ran into　some other friends I haven’t seen since March and had a pretty good evening. We later went to karaoke. I met another woman in this crowd that I had apparently met over a year ago. Her name was Natsu, and she said she met me on a camping trip during my first year. I remembered the trip, but I couldn’t recall meeting her at all. She said it was probably because she had put on some weight. She was probably right.

However, she had an interesting job as tour guide in foreign countries. She typically went to China, leading groups through Beijing and Shanghai. But she traveled all over the world for her job, including Rome, London, Paris, San Francisco, Vancouver, Hong Kong, Taiwan, Korea, and numerous other destinations popular with Japanese tourists.

Democrats take the House アメリカの選挙

今日はアメリカの選挙です。民主的なグループは勝ちました。おめでとうございます！

After careful consideration, I've decided I'm not going to use this blog to spout my political opinions (despite overwhelming faultlessness and indisputability) at this point in time. But I'm sure most of you know that myself and all the American expats I know in Japan are toasting tonight.

Instead, I thought I would leave you all with another stupid youtube video!

A Day in Nikko 日光

金曜日は日光市に行きました。古い神社とお寺を行って見ました。日光市の渋滞とても大変でした。渋滞から私がちょっと怒りました。でも日光市は楽しかった。猿はちょっと意地悪と思いました。猿は一人だけ見ました。寂しいと思いました。日光市の秋はとてもきれいでした。　野生の猿を見ました。渋滞から早くで帰りました。


Nestled in the mountains north of Tokyo lies one of the greatest cultural and natural treasures in all of Japan. For over a thousand years, the temples and shrines of Nikko hid amongst the enormous cedar forests on rugged hills. Shrouded in mystery and seclusion, Nikko holds some of the greatest wonders of traditional Japanese architecture, art, history and culture.

But like most wonderful things that have been “loved to death,” Nikko is now an immensely popular tourist trap for Tokyo residents vainly seeking a respite from the crowded subways and sidewalks of one of the world’s most crowded cities. Their futile attempt at escape from an insane urban nightmare is thwarted at every turn in the crowded National Park.

Traffic slows to a crawl, inching across poorly planned public infrastructure with the speed of glaciers. Over one hour behind schedule, as I approach Nikko station to pick up my friend Erika I summon every ounce of self restraint to keep my temper in check.

Once I actually meet up with Erika, and she takes me into the temples, I jostle with only a mildly annoying crowd.

I also see my first wild monkey! I see one monkey and ponder the whereabouts of the rest of his clan. He sat on a sidewalk with busy traffic and started harassing people for food. He lunged at several passing tourists with plastic bags. Erika tells me that the monkeys pester unsuspecting travelers because they want food, the annoying product of ignorant tourists feeding wild animals and turning them into pests. I can’t help but recall living in the canyon and watching people do the same to squirrels, deer and any other critter brave enough to eat from someone's hand.

We left sooner than I expected, thinking the traffic will be just as bad leaving the place.

Alison Yeardley raises $400 for Breast Cancer!

My friend Alison Yeardley, if some of you will recall, is living in Houston Texas, where she is teaching at a British primary school. This is a better picture that she sent me, so that I could congratulate her for all the money she raised in the race. Unfortunately, lacking a credit card, I've had some trouble sending her some money. But I promised her that I'll send some money for her cause before Christmas!

Anyways, I'm thinking I can use this blog to promote other charities and pet causes that any of my readers might be interested in. So far, Alison Yeardley has promoted the Susan G. Komen Breast Cancer Foundation. Being that I have a vast internet audience around the globe, all my readers should tell me about their favorite charities! If I decide that I like the charity, I will promote it.

So come on readers!! Everybody tell me where you give your money!!


彼女の名前はアリソ\u12531 ンヤールドリーさんです。私の友達です。彼女はイギリス人です。でも今はアメリカのテクサス州に住んでいる。イギリスの小学校で働きます。5年前カリフォルニア州でリソ\u12531 ンヤールドリーさんに会いました。最近は癌の研究のためにロードレースをやりました。

Another Silly Diet Coke and Mentos Commercial

Here comes another Diet Coke and Mentos video, this time from my brother in law and faithful blog reader Seth Holler. As you can plainly see in the video, they rig this ridiculous domino contraption to shoot soda pop and and candy all over the place. See the video here.

The first question anyone asks is... who has this kind of free time?

I'm kind of tired right now, so I'm going to write more on this later.

Around the World Farewell Party

私の友達みえさんは4ヶ月間の世界旅行をします。昨日の夜は送別会がありました。とても楽しかったです。たくさんの友達に会いました。Ａｍｙさんはマレーシアから来ました。Ａｍｙさんはとても面白かったです。ウエイターさんがジッパーを忘れたときにＡｍｙさんが笑いました。そのことをみんなに英語で知らせました。でもウエイターさんは全く気がつきませんでした!Ａｍｙさんの冗談はちょっと変だなと思いましたね！

Yesterday, a small group of friends of mine and I bid farewell to Mie, who is embarking on a 3 month voyage around the world. She and her mother signed up for a four month cruise, which will take her to 15 different ports of call around the world, including Vietnam, Seychelles, Kenya, Egypt, Greece, Spain, Morocco, Libya, Venezuela, Panama, California, and numerous places between. I am honestly quite jealous of her trip and wish I could do something similar myself.

I have been toying with the idea of doing an around the world trip, but I don’t know if I will ever have the courage to go through with it. Mie’s trip has a very strict itinerary though, and I’m not sure I would want that.

I met up with Mie and several other friends from the Japanese class where she teaches and I attend. Several others from the class joined us. The aforementioned Tomoe made an appearance and Malaysians Enchan and Amy came as well. We met at a local restaurant for dinner and joked around. The manager came over to fill our coffee, and Amy couldn’t stop giggling because the poor man had forgotten to zip his fly! Speaking English, she pointed it out to everyone at the table who could understand (me, Enchan and Tomoe). Like a gaggle of freshmen at band camp, muffled laughter and red faces quickly infected the table. This particular episode highlights my need to make friends who are more mature, or at least find more male friends.

Originally from Malaysia, Amy is married with children and lives with her Japanese in-laws in Motomiyamachi. I really don’t know her very well, except that she once sent me an text to my phone (at midnight) asking about my astrological sign. Because of her asian appearance, people often assume she is Japanese until she opens her mouth. Amy entertained us with ridiculous stories of a flasher that appeared outside her school playground when she lived in Malaysia. After the 3rd or 4th time, it wasn’t such a shock and kids just laughed at the guy. She was quite funny as well.

Also, my friend Tomoe is planning a trip to the USA and Canada in February or March, and needs people with couches to crash on. She speaks fluent English when she feels like it, and is very outgoing. So if you don’t mind showing off what a great country we have, let me know and I will send her your way.

We all wished Mie well on her voyage and asked her to bring back all sorts of trinkets and junk she found. We’ll wait and see what I get in February.

Diet Coke & Mentos

Today, I went to Tomoe’s church for the first time. Like the other churches I have attended here in Japan, this one wasn’t very different on the surface. They met at Tomoe’s house in Motomiyamachi, where Tomoe’s father was the pastor. And while most of his sermon went way over my head, I was proud of the fact that I at least could tell what he was talking about most of the time.

Following this, Mie, Tomoe and I drove to Koriyama in Mie’s car. talking about something or another, when the subject of youtube came up. Being a Youtube addict in dire need of a 12-step program, I quickly described a number of the videos I had seen. Tomoe also told of some videos and provided a detailed description of the site to Mie, who had never heard of it. One of the videos I described seeing was what happens when you drop mentos candy into Diet Coke.

When we stopped at a 7-eleven, I instantly made a beeline for the Diet Coke, which isn’t a product I typically buy in Japan. I also bought the last package of Mentos candy, which is something I'm not typically aware of in Japanese stores. Tomoe was laughing so hard just at the thought of me doing this at a 7-11 that I thought she might get a hernia. I put the bottle out in the parking lot and dropped one candy in, as they do in the videos. Unfortunately, it only fizzed up about 20 centimeters. I was kind of disappointed.

So I ran inside and got a second bottle, this time determined to drop 5 candies into the bottle. On coming out of the store though, Tomoe stopped laughing just long enough to point out the fact that I had forgotten to pay! I was risking deportation and all kinds of legal trouble for a stupid human trick! I rushed back inside as fast as I could, while bowing and profusely apologizing to the attendants. I summoned the most polite groveling Japanese I could. Having watched my antics on the sidewalk, the employees were somewhat amused and I think they understood that it was an honest mistake. My two friends will probably never let me live it up though!

Motomiyamachi Festival and the Dashi 山車

今日は山車の写真を撮りました。

On Saturday, I woke somewhat early in order to go hiking up near a ski resort. The weather turned out to be perfect. A nice cool breeze and blue skies prevailed after a slightly foggy morning. My friend Mie and I drove up a dirt road that followed a ski lift, until the road finally broke off and made for a separate mountain.

We arrived at a trailhead to see numerous trucks, a construction crew, and a pile of rotten wood. It turns out that workers were removing old retainers that were placed along the trail to contain erosion and work as stairs. The crews were using these gas powered hauling devices with tank tracks to haul the wood up the trails. The things might have held about half a cord of wood, while the worker stood behind it and controlled it like a lawnmower. They were loud and obnoxious, and spoiled what was otherwise a lovely day. We passed three of them on the way in and passed another 2 on the way out. It was a lovely hike otherwise, but we unfortunately missed the spectacular autumn leaves that grace the Japanese mountains.

Following this, Mie and left early. We went to a festival, where we met another friend of ours. We promised to photograph her carrying a mikoshi, which is a portable shrine carried on the shoulders, (picture an Asian version of the Ark of the Convenant). We finally met up with Enchan, a Malaysian exchange student at a local high school. I met both Mie and Enchan through my new Japanese class in this town. She was carrying a shrine with a bunch of women in the town’s annual harvest festival/parade, and had spent the previous week begging somebody to come photograph her carrying the shrine.

We got there around sunset and conditions were pretty good, and I got some great shots of Enchan and a large dashi. A dashi is a shrine carriage with wheels that is covered with glowing paper lanterns called chouchin. This festival wasn’t quite as big as the one I saw in Hanamaki with my friend Brenden. But I liked it nonetheless.

Mie and I met up with another friend, Tomoe during the evening. Tomoe spent most of the time spilling gossip about all the foreigners at a foreigner’s Halloween Party the previous night. So I spent a lot of time listening to her tell about the philandering lifestyles of people I met 2 years ago and haven’t seen since.

Stretching with Students ストレッチ!

昨日安積中学校でストレッチの会議がありました。二年生は全員体育館へ行きました。2時頃やりました。ストレッチの先生は郡山市の体育プログラムから来ました。彼女はあまりじょうずじゃないと思いました。いつも右側だけをやって、左側を忘れていました。それから筋肉痛があります、でも右側だけですね。放課後は陸所部活と一緒にやりました。著郷里を走りました。陸女部活は楽しかったよ！

Today at school, they scheduled an entire afternoon for nothing but stretches. All of the ni-nenseis (8th graders) went to the gym for 2 hours of stretching excersizes. And by stretching, I mean that we did nothing but stretch all afternoon until cleaning time. I actually didn't mind so much. As I have been feeling kind of lethargic and sluggish for the last few weeks, I was happy to limber up.

Unfortunately, the woman leading the stretching exersizes wasn't particularly good at her job. The principal introduced her as coming from some kind of city sports program, although the details were lost in translation. On the surface she resembled my aerobics instructor and a lot of the younger female PE teachers, overly fit, petite, healthy looking (attractive) and extremely cheerful and energetic. She had some great stretches in her routine, but she often failed to lead everyone in stretching both sides of the body! So when we were finished stretching our left leg or whatever, she would forget to stretch the right one. At first I wondered if I wasn't hearing her correctly or paying attention, but after 30 minutes of this I realized that she was just incompetent.

School Festival Weekend 中学校の文化祭

中学校の文化祭に行きました。しゅうまつは日和田中学校と片平中学校に行きました。日和田中の文化祭は楽しかった。でも病気から帰りました。頭が痛かった。日曜日は片平中の文化祭へ行きました。片平中は太鼓をありました。楽しかった。しかしちょっと寂しかった。

Saturday morning, I went to Hiwada Middle School’s Bunkasai, or school festival, as everyone is so quick to translate it. It is basically a big production put on by the students. The students showcase their artwork, raise money through selling food and donations, and spend several hours sitting in a darkened gym putting on various stage productions and presentations.

The highlight that all the parents and teachers talk about is the choral competition, where each class sings a choral song to the school, in a competition with the other homeroom classes and grades. Always accompanied by a pianist, some of the classes are quite good, while others obviously need work. My first year here in Japan, I found the format and everything very strange. After two years however, it seems just as natural to have the chorus competition as it is natural to have pumpkin pie on Thanksgiving.

Katahira’s bunkasai was on Sunday, so my weekend was completely booked. Katahira has a unique tradition of incorporating Taiko drumming into their bunkasai. Unique to Japan, Taiko drumming is difficult to describe. Picture 30 uniformed people banging heavy wooden drums at fast paces and high decibels. Drums range in size from that of a small bowl to enormous cylinders large enough to contain a VW Beetle. I'll let you guess who got to help carry the “big drum” into the gym.

The students bang on them in unison. I have heard enough Taiko drumming at competitions, half marathons, and other events to know that Katahira’s middle schoolers were not going to win any prizes, but they were impressive nonetheless. I was proud of them for learning the songs (they had to bring in two outside teachers to put the performances together).

At the end of the class performances, 6 of the girls put on a REAL taiko production.
The six girls obviously do this quite regularly, and have done so for a long time. Having obviously put an enormous amount of work into it, this final drum performance was very impressive, and worth the 6 hours at school.

For those of you in the states who don’t know what taiko drumming sounds (and looks) like, check out another youtube video. The picture above is from last year's event, as I forgot my camera. This year we had one drum that was MUCH bigger. You can rent Tom Cruise’s “The Last Samurai” and there is a sequence in it somewhere with the telltale drums on the soundtrack. (The movie is basically scientology nut Tom Cruise ripping off “Dances with Wolves”, but in Japan.)

Katahira's Bunkasai then finished after several very weak performances, and I was happy to get home and salvage the remaining hours of an extremely busy weekend.

The Japanese Rice Harvest

Saturday was the day of Hiwada Middle School's school festival. It was scheduled to last until about 3 or 4 oclock, but something was happening that day that I just could not pass up. Today was the final day of the rice harvest.

My friend Sanpei Sensei, who teaches P.E. at Katahira JHS, was in the process of harvesting the rice growing from his modest little plot of soil in front of his house. He lives Northeast of my city, where I imagine most everybody has a rice field. It's quite common for families, especially in rural areas, to own a bit of land (usually about an acre or 2) and do this for a little free food, or make a little cash on the side.

Sanpei Sensei was excited that I could come and help him harvest. I arrived about 1 or 2 in the afternoon, and saw about 5 people out in his field. Initially thinking he had hired some help, I discovered that they were in fact his family! Sanpei Sensei's mother, who I had previously only seen sitting hunched over in her orthopedic seat with a back problem, (I never saw her move during the 5 or 6 hours I previously spent at their home) was out there slaving away with his wife and sons. Meeting this woman 5 months ago, I wouldn't have thought she could even walk very well, let alone carry enormous enormous bags of rice.

As soon as I got there I quickly realized that a ratty t-shirt and my hiking boots would not suffice. His wife's maternal instincts quickly kicked in, and I was outfitted with a thick overcoat and gloves to protect my forearms from sharp rice stems. I would come to be very grateful for this. She also insisted I wear a hat and a face mask, which I would be less grateful for, as it just looked kind of dorky. I also lacked adequate footwear, and wished I had bought some long boots for wading in the mud.

I was set to work learning the most unsophisticated of tasks under the careful tutelage of Sanpei Sensei's son. About 2 weeks before my arrival, the rice was cut from the ground and tied along scaffolds to dry out. Our task was to remove the whole plant from this scaffolding and put it into a machine. The machine looked like a hunchbacked commercial lawnmower with tank tracks. He operated a the contraption that bagged rice, while I was responsible for the vital task of throwing the rice stems into the machine.

The machine then haphazardly spewed dust, dirt, and smoke out the front, used up stems out the side, and poured large quantities of rice into bags waiting in the rear. The bags were arranged on a track, so you could leave them behind as they filled up, seamlessly switching to another bag while you work. It was rather brainless work on my part, just throwing the rice into one side.

As a way of thanking me for an honest afternoon's work, Sanpei Sensei took me out with his family to a sushi restaurant. Sanpei Sensei and I had a good time, but I think his sons thought I was nuts for wanting to help with the rice harvest. For them I guess, it would be like some crazy foreign guy in suburban America who makes a visit to help his friend mow the lawn, clean the gutters and rake the leaves, or some other mundanity. I wouldn't have understood that when I was 16 either.

Karaoke with 5 year olds.

One thing I like about my neighborhood is the youthfulness. Most of my apartment neighbors consist of young mothers with their small children. Their children range in age from 6 months to 5 years old. If the weather is nice, I often catch them outside playing with their children in the parking lot if the weather permits. So I sometimes have fun playing with their kids and chatting with them to learn Japanese. They are friendly ladies, and over the last 2 years, I’ve gotten to know them quite well. My friend Adoni does the same, and we often hang out with them.

Awhile back, we were invited to a couple of the BBQs they held, and one woman, Aki, invites us to dinner parties she holds at her new house. She moved out of the apartments when she and her husband finished building a brand new home in a suburban area nearby. She still brings her kids over to play though, and we’ve become good friends.

So on Friday night, my friend Adoni (from New York) and I were invited to attend the birthday party of Aki’s son Shota. Another neighbor came along with her two sons, who are about Shota’s age. Another woman from the neighborhood joined us as well. This party was to be held at a sprawling Karaoke complex. Only the mothers with 5 year old boys came along.

The evening was kind of interesting, although a bit awkward. Aki is pregnant, and the third woman, Kaori, had just bore a child 6 months ago. So I learned lots of new words, like tsuwari (morning sickness). In fact, between listening to their five year olds scream pokemon songs on the karaoke machine, I spent most of the evening listening to the ladies chat to me about morning sickness, doctor's visits, and breast feeding. I just sheepishly smiled, and tried not to blush too much while pretending I could relate.

I wished they had brought their husbands along so I could have had some more varied conversation. I rarely see their husbands, as they slave away till 8 or 9 at night. As for the karaoke, I still can’t sing any Japanese songs decently, but I almost nailed a couple. The kids were singing all kinds of Dragonball and Doraemon songs that I had never heard. They also made a spectacular mess of the karaoke room.

Whale Meat for Lunch???

The school lunches in Japan typically consist of semi-traditional Japanese fare. The students put on a big production of serving it to each other and eating it together in the classroom. Typically one can count on eating rice, some kind of soup, a vegetable, and a piece of meat/fish on most days of the week. Some days they will have a variation with some kind of noodle dish or jelly sandwiches instead of rice.

Some of the teachers pay great attention to what they eat, largely because they aren't crazy about many Japanese foods. They read the school lunch menu, (or have it read too them). I on the other hand, usually enjoy the school lunch, and consider most of it to be fairly nutritious and wholesome grindage, despite its tendency to be quite bland. The curry & rice they serve is often particularly good. I pay little attention to what I'm eating, and often don't even know what it is. While I used to be a very finicky eater, I just couldn't be bothered to care about anything I stuff in my face anymore.

Then yesterday, another English teacher by the name of Christel asked me if I had eaten the lunch on Tuesday. I replied yes, asking why she was curious. She responded that the fish that day, was in fact a large Cetacean mammal! I had heard of Whale meat being served in Japanese lunches, but never actually had the experience of it being served to me.

Many of my environmentalist readers may be familiar with the controversy Japan is in right now, as they conduct "scientific whaling" under the auspices of "research." But everyone knows it winds up in Tokyo supermarkets and on the plates of Middle School Students. The Japanese have begun harvesting Minke whales, much to the displeasure of most of the planet.

I'm not sure how I feel about this. On the one hand, an informed opinion would suggest the Japanese government could certainly make an argument for a carefully managed harvest of certain whale species, assuming a thorough environmental impact study supports such a plan. But what has happened, is that they are killing whales in International waters against the wishes of the rest of the international community, which I find most disturbing. This is surprising, because I find Japanese culture often surpresses the needs of individuals to the needs of the rest of the group. So why then, is the Japanese government as beligerent and thickheaded as it is on the world stage with regards to whaling? I aslo find many people I meet to be concerned about how their country is percieved in the rest of the world, even if that only amounts to how popular sushi is in America.

Sailing Inawashiro with the Koriyama Yacht Club

Every autumn in Japan, all of the middle schools across the land put on a big production called a bunkasai, or school festival. Students entertain parents and the day is filled filled with singing, dance productions, skits, other assorted activities, speeches, and what passes for entertainment in this country.

Because I had committed to attending two of these bunkasais, I wasn't able to join my friend Teppei Takahashi for our monthly moutaineering excursion into the woods. So he kindly invited me to join him on the waters of Lake Inawashiro at his "Yacht Club" the week all the Bunkasais ended. Teppei and I head up to the hills every other month or so for some hiking and mountaineering, but this was my first time sailing with him.

This would be fantastic! Spending a sporty day with mist and spray in my face as our vessel screamed across the water at breakneck speed! Whitecaps smashing over the deck and threatening to capsize our vessel! Rubbing shoulders with all the beautiful people while as a five course meal is served to us on the deck, complete with champagne, caviar, and all sorts of Japanese delicacies I couldn't possibly afford! Then kicking the boat back into high gear and returning to shore, as I stand triumphantly on the bow of a majestic vessel arriving at an exotic port of call!

Teppei picked me up before dawn and we drove up to Lake Inawashiro, which lies over the mountains to the West of Koriyama City. When he told me our destination, my preconceptions were already in doubt. We met up with a number of Teppei's Koriyama Yacht club friends at the Club's lake shore campground. Upon seeing the property, all the images in the previous paragraph were instantly shattered. Several people's tiny boats, some ancient sheds full of life jackets and thick brush surrounded a dying campfire and 2 tents. Most people had camped the previous evening, sailing their dingys on the nearby lake shore. We gave them a hand as they loaded their tiny sailboats back onto trailers. Teppei seemed particularly proud of the fact that the club made (by hand) most of the custom trailers and roof racks hauling their little boats. I was a bit surprised that these little dingys, most of which were not much bigger than a large canoe, passed as yachts (yotto), but that's what they called them! But they reassured me we'd be in a much bigger boat for the afternoon.

After cleaning the campsite and eating breakfast, we all drove off for a marina on the other side of Lake Inawashiro. Twenty minutes later, we reached the marina where the sailboats were still small, but a much more respectable size. The marina crew lowered the club's boat into the water, and we all piled into a ship dubbed the "World Wind." The boat was apparently owned by one member of the club, but they all contributed to marina fees and maintenance costs. So THIS was the magnificent vessel everyone was boasting about at breakfast! While only 20 or so feet from bow to stern, it would be perfect for an afternoon of fun on the lake.

After some basic maintenance, our team was ready to go! We quickly departed after loading the ship with giant cases full of onigiri and a week's supply of beer. How long were we going to be out here? The sun had finally pierced the foggy haze and blue skies surrounded us. I had been concerned about weather, as Lake Inawashiro often gets relentless rain showers. At times, I've seen some scary storms on the lake as well. While relieved at the beautiful weather, we lacked a good strong wind, which surprised everyone on board. The area usually gets a good strong wind from the West. Consequently, we never did get moving much faster than two or three knots. Good thing we brought lots of beer!

Lake Inawashiro, the third largest freshwater lake in Japan, is located just West of Koriyama City. It lies right near the center of Fukushima Prefecture in North Central Honshu. Steeply terraced rice fields and rugged green mountains of cedar forests surround the beautiful lake on almost all sides. Besides sailing, Inawashiro serves as the local playground for numerous other water-sports enthusiasts, as wind surfers, kayakers and jet-skiers flock to its shores on the weekend. Siberian swans find refuge on its shores in the winter, and attract their legions of weekend ornithologists armed with cameras and binoculars. Winter also bring skiers to the slopes, who come from all around in search of decent powder, majestic views, and steaming hot onsens. The imposing slopes of Mount Bandai preside over the whole area with ominous doom, waiting for the day when the peak spews forth a cloud of toxic ash and violent pyroclastic avalanches of superheated gas and rubble.

Trying to keep my mind off the image of an eruption, I met some pretty interesting folks aboard the ship. There were a couple of guys who lived in the USA at various times, although they had forgotten most of their English. There was also a guy and his son who had lived in China for several years. His son had also gone to one of my schools, but long before I ever got there. Despite living in Japan for over two years, I was still impressed by everyone's hospitality. Everyone was curious about my impressions of Japan and Koriyama City and I entertained them as best I could with crazy stories from the local middle school I teach at.

Then there was my friend Teppei Takahashi, who works for the City. While he's never lived abroad as his friends have, he's an extremely adventurous and outgoing guy, often boisterous and very talkative. He's extremely sporty, and responsible for various city sports programs and the school lunch menu. He's at the head of his section, which is comprised almost entirely of former PE teachers. While most of the people in the city hall work late into the evening, (or pretend to do so), his section always goes home at 5 PM sharp. I can usually find Teppei pumping iron at our local gym after hours as well. Its very refreshing to see folks here with such healthy attitudes about work and play.

Anyways, back to sailing. I learned a few things about sailing by watching the crew, but I mostly just tried to stay out of everyone's way. I learned some important Japanese sailing terminology, including sutaba! (starboard) It was a great day, and everyone was having a good time until....we spotted GODZILLA rising from the lakebed!

To be continued......

日曜日はヨットに乗りました。郡山のヨットクラブと一緒に猪苗代湖で船旅をしました。去年郡山市役所で働いている私の友達の高橋哲平さんと会いました。郡山のヨットクラブは２０人位います。ときどき高橋哲平さんと一緒に山登りします。クラブのヨットの名前はＷｏｒｌｄ　Ｗｉｎｄです。ヨットは８ｍ位だと思います。　いい天気でした。でも風は少し弱いと思いました。ヨットはゆっくり動きました。日焼けしてしまいました。痛かったです。クラブの人々は親切でした。楽しかったよ！　

Saturday at Xaverio Junior High School

Yesterday, I went to the International Day festival at Xaverio Chugakko, a private girl’s school here in Koriyama. Xaverio is actually a Catholic school, begun by a group of Canadian missionaries before I came here. I’m uncertain how strongly religious instruction is stressed at Xaverio, and actually know very little about it. The school does however, have an excellent reputation in the city for English Education. Every year except last, they have taken the city middle school English Speech Contest Prize.

I showed up at 9:30, and was put in a room with all the other foreigners. Then they held a big opening ceremony. Finally they escorted me to a class of first year students (7th graders). The students stood up one by one and introduced themselves, which went something like this: “Hello! My name is Akiko! I like cat! I play table tennis after school! I also like okonomiyaki!” (Okonomiyaki is a fried Korean pancake thing.)

After 20 or so variations on this, I gave my own introduction in roughly the same manner, something I’ve grown accustomed to in my own job. Following this introduction, we broke off into small groups and I was with roughly 8 girls who were supposed to ask me questions and practice English with me. This was to last roughly 1 hour.

After 5 minutes, all the kids had exhausted their questions and vocabulary, so I entertained the girls with silly impersonations of famous Japanese singers, politicians, and comedians. I don’t like to brag, but my group was laughing longer and louder than all the other groups in my class combined! (A special thanks goes out to my father, for teaching me the “finger in your ear, tounge in your cheek” thing). I finally thought of an English game to play, and we did that for the rest of the hour.

I was lucky they were younger, and there was less structure in the class. I felt sorry for the 3rd year students, who had to spend a whole hour talking about global warming and the merits of recycling PET bottles in English. (American readers, imagine doing this in Spanish as an 8th grader).

After this, there was a big closing ceremony, where the school presented a large donation to an orphanage in Rwanda. They gave us a lunch, and then I left.

Giant Japanese Wasps

今日は大きいスズメバチが私のクラスに来ました。生徒がとても怖がりました。スズメバチは5㎝ぐらいの大きさだったと思います。太いだった大きさ。アメリカのアリゾナ腫のスズメバチは細いです。

During most of my classes, I have some measure of control over the activities, content, and control of the class. However, there are those days or classes when the teacher still wishes for me to follow their own strict lesson plan, or do something ridiculous, impossible, or both. Today was such a day, when I was asked (ordered) to lead the class in singing a sappy song about saving the starving children of the world. The song was aptly written by none other than...Michael Jackson.

Most of you know, I'm not musically, and especially vocally inclined, so I was mildly dreading a lessson involving a song about healing children by Wacko Jacko. I had never even heard the song before, as I managed to dodge it during my previous two years. But it is in the textbook, so of course we have to do it. And my luck ran dry, or so I thought.

However, halfway into the second round, I was saved from implementing such joyless and wearisome instruction by an enormous mutant wasp! I kid you not, this thing was over two inches long. And it wasn’t like the skinny American wasps, this thing was fat and beefy. It looked like it could tussle with a humming bird. I don’t call it mutant lightly either, as Fukushima prefecture's stable soils make it Northern Japan’s primary location for nuclear power plants (the soils absorb earthquakes better here). The size of this wasp suggests a dire need for a new environmental impact study. I suspect the behemoth and its brood can glow in the dark and read minds.

As soon as it flew into the room, I heard cries of “KOWAI!! (scary), and most of the kids quickly poured out of the room. They turned the lights off, opened the windows and waited for the Pilsbury insect to lose interest in my Michael Jackson lesson. The minute the wasp left, the bell rang, and the torture was over. Saved from teaching the King of Pop!

You can watch this cool video I found here.

Mt. Adatara with my Japanese Class

Following the early departure of Couchsurfer Dan, I left with my friend Mie and headed up to the hills on my own very special mountain excursion. We met my Japanese class on the trailhead. All the students (mostly Chinese) and the volunteers whose hobby is teaching Japanese to foreigners every Thursday night gathered early in the morning at a ski resort.

We took the lazy way up, paying 800 yen (about 7-8 USD) for a 5 minute gondola ride. The weather early in the morning was rather crummy, but tolerable. A light drizzle came down, chilled by a strong wind from the Southwest, remnants of the typhoon that previously hit on Friday.

The Japanese volunteers were divided into 2 distinct categories. One group was totally unprepared for hiking and hardly had the slightest clue what to bring. Wearing jeans, casual shoes, leather purses, and pullover sweaters, any upswing in the rain might make their day utterly miserable. Their umbrellas quickly broken, or carried off by a strong wind, it was apparent to me that they didn't spend much time in the mountains.

The other group, was decked out in the latest yellow, orange, purple and red gore-tex raingear from The North Face or some other trendy, overpriced "trekking" brand. This camp came sporting waterproof hats over wollen caps, 4 layers of polypro (or whatever overpriced fiber was developed by Dupont last week), gators on their new boots (there was no snow), and colorful ski gloves. Their backpacks were capable of hauling enough supplies for 3-4 days. They looked prepared for Antarctica, and not the little pile of dirt known as Mount Adatara in the fall. These folks apparently spend more time in the gear shop than on the mountain, evidence that they weren't any more experienced than the first group. As an avid hiker and rock-climber, I won't try and pretend I don't like, own or covet some of these products, but to drag it all along for an easy day hike seemed rather pretentious and excessive.

The hike was very good, except for the weather and visibility close to the summit, and the massive crowd of people streaming up and down the mountain. The mud wasn't very fun either. I have climbed it once previously with a friend, but we did it in the winter, when nobody else was there (and the ski resort had not yet opened). This time, the fall colors were beautiful, and numerous different shades of red, yellow, and orange. With the lousy weather, I wasn't able to get any terribly good shots.

I also had fun talking to everyone, including my tutor Tomoko, who is pictured here.

CouchSurfing guy hangs 5 at my place

私の友達は群馬県から郡山市に来ました。　Couchsurfing.comのウエブサイトで出会いました。彼はとても頭がいいです。私たちはたくさんの同じ本を読んだことがあります。わたしはダンさんの福島県の友達を知っていました。ビックリ！　トンカツのレストランへ一緒に行きました。

Saturday marked my first experience with "The Couchsurfing Project" which is a website for people who love to travel, but either lack a budget or show interest in seeing and meeting people 'off the beaten path.' I had made an account several months prior, anticipating surfing couches from time to time in Italy. For reasons I cannot entirely recall, I never did get that opportunity, but I never deleted my account. And last week, I got my first request for someone to come and visit me.

The concept behind the Couchsurfing Project is very simple. You sign up, and then request to surf someone's couch when you are traveling. You have a profile page that tells a little bit about yourself, so they can decide if they want to host you or not. This is Daniel's profile. You can also pick and choose who you wish to stay with, if you think you would get along better with someone else. You also get to say how many you can host and control a number of other factors. It is fairly safe too, because all communications are monitored, and it is difficult to host or be hosted until you have been "vouched for."

Daniel emailed me Friday as he was planning a quick trip to my area to climb Mt. Bandai, one of the more picturesque mountains around these parts. I picked him up at the station at about 6 and we went to dinner at a well-known Tonkatsu place in town. The food was excellent, and I'm glad Dan came, because I don't think I would have gone otherwise.

But it also turns out that Dan is not a complete stranger from the internet after all. He works as an English Teacher with the JET Programme just like I do. He came over at the same time I did and we discovered we shared some mutual friends. After the post-arrival Tokyo Orientation conference 2 years ago, he moved to Gunma-Ken, while I was shipped to Fukushima-Ken. We traded stories about our travels, experiences in Japan, and many other things.

Unfortunately, I wasn't able to climb Bandai-san with him, as I was climbing another nearby mountain with my Japanese class volunteers and classmates. I failed in my attempt to convince him to join my class on another peak. So after he stayed, I dropped him off at a nearby station so he could climb Mount Bandai.

Yanaizu & Enzou-ji

Over the weekend, I went with friends of mine up to the mountains for a hike. I drove Jake and his girlfriend Junko out to an area near Yanaaizu, about 2 hours East by car. I've been to Aizu before, but never so far East. Steep rugged mountains covered in green trees surrounded the narrow windy highway.

It was a relatively easy hike. It only took about 2 hours to reach some kind of radio transmitter on the summit. There was a lovely town far below. See the pictures.

We also found an injured preying mantis. Like most people in the world, most Japanese have an aversion to insects, although entomology is a popular hobby. But this aversion to insects seems to have 3 notable exceptions: big stag beetles, dragonflies, and preying mantises. While most people will freak out if they find a spider or an ant on them, if Japanese people see one of the above, it is typically regarded as cute, kind of like a hampster or a parakeet. This particular mantis was injured, as you can see from the picture, which is probably why he didn't try to escape from us.

Anyways, after the hike, we visited a unique temple where a guy was doing very unique throat singing. I've never heard anything like it live before. The temple also had an unusual amount of ornately carved cedar on it. Very pretty.

The entire Aizu region is famous for a mythical red cow that supposedly helped some farmers move a tree stump and then suddenly disappeared into the forest. A big bronze statue of the cow was there outside the temple.

Following this, we went to an onsen, which is Japanese for Hot Springs. You bathe off before you get into the water, and then you sit around and chat. You go in naked and they only give men a tiny loin cloth. Women get a substantially bigger towel for obvious reasons.

"Weird Al's" New Album

私のお気に入り歌手は新しいアルバムを解放した。
“イアルドアール”です。音楽はいつも面白いです。でも日本ではイアルドアールありません。

I normally maintain a very strict policy about never viewing internet advertisements, but I have to say I made my first exception in over a year when I saw Weird Al Yankovic's New Album in an add banner. It's called "Straight outta Lynwood," and I can't seem to find it in any record stores here in Japan. Family and friends now know what to buy me for Christmas. Only found a couple of the videos on Youtube.

I remember listening to him back when I was a kid, buying the album with my allowance at the nearest record store. I would put it on my father's stereo, and annoy him with the hilarious paradies of whatever pop music drivel came out the previous year. When my parent's tolerance was sufficiently exhausted, I would sit in my room on my old queen size waterbed, with the songs blairing in my ears through enormous headphones. After 5 or 6 weeks, I would be sick of it and never listen to it again exept when like minded friends came to visit.

Then I remember in college, driving around with Paul Brodar in his Blazer or Honda listening to Weird Al and Dr Demento tapes, usually on our way to go rock climbing or skip rocks on Lake Mary at some ludicrous hour.

It really is sad and pathetic when your life is reduced to excitement over the release of the latest "Weird Al" collection. To be honest, my life isn't so sad. I've got a great circle of friends, both in the States and here in Japan. I realize that I'm loved and accepted by good people and by God. I'm finally letting go of all my old self esteem problems that have plagued me for so long, and for the first time ever, I'm starting to live my life without thinking what other people think or say about me I'm not worried anymore about who I'm seen with or where I'm seen. I'm not going to let others try and put me down for my tastes in music or clothes or little idiosyncrasies. I'm not giving any details, but I've recently seen firsthand how insecure people put others down, and it is truly a pathetic sight. For the first time ever, I don't have a problem with being white & nerdy!

The Caption Contest is Back in Action!

Last week's (2 weeks ago?) photo caption contest was quite memorable, with 2 entries from Skilz. So by non-participatory default, the winner of the previous entry, and reigning caption champion Skilz once again retains his title, this time with: "Too poor to afford a Dale Earnhardt t-shirt, Sasquatch decided that the next best thing would be to wax the number 3 into his overgrown back hair."

This weeks contest picture is the other picture. (Obviously.) A large black bull staring at the camera. This picture comes courtesy of Suzanne Gamelin, who I believe sent it to me over a year ago in some kind of forwarded email with fun pictures. Anyways, put a caption on it and challenge Skilz to his title in the heavyweight Belly Button Caption Contest!!

Basketball, Tennis, & Ping Pong OH MY!!

Last week my city held their large sports tournament for all the schools in the city. Each school sent their teams out to compete for the title in their sport. As there were no classes that day, I went out and about to watch the various tournaments at the various different schools. Having gone to Katahirachu for 3 years, I decided to stop in and watch their girls basketball team, whom I sometimes practice with. Unfortunately, their team was cut very short, and they only had 6 players! They never really had a chance, and were clobbered by a rival school.

I also got to watch some tennis during the first day of tournaments. During the second day, rain forced cancellation of the game. So I went indoors to watch the Hiwada JHS boys volleyball team completely slaughter a rival. As they were obviously not in need of my moral support, I went over to watch some more table tennis. I have never seen so many ping pong games at one time than when I first watched this tournament 2 years ago.

You can look at the pictures to see what went on.

Tarako Pasta Sauce

I suppose I am putting too many of these Youtube videos here, but they're just too hilarious to pass up. Youtube also happens to be the only place that happens to host all these videos in one place.

This is a commercial that's been floating around in Japan for some time, but has recently resurfaced. I was taught the song over a year ago by some friends of mine (a bunch of giggly girls at a bar), and my kids find it hilarious when I mock the song. Unfortunately I have never had the (privilege?) of seeing it until I was in the supermarket and it was blairing on a TV set in a product display the other day. Its Tarako Pasta Sauce. It means something like fish child, and it is a fish egg sauce you put on spagetti. It must be seen to be believed. Tarako, ne.

So I quickly bought the pasta sauce and tried it with some spaghetti. Not too bad really. A little bit salty for spaghetti though. Perhaps salty isn't the correct word. However, I probably won't be buying it again though. I'm just not much of a spaghetti man, unless its accompanied by a big meatball.

New Japanese Driver's License

私は運転免許を取りました。最近車でどこにもへ行きます。


One of the most difficult experiences of my time in Japan is finally over. This experience left a terrible impression on me, something akin to the nasty aftertaste left in your mouth after vomiting profusely. After nearly six months, around 850 US dollars, 10 hours in driving lessons, 6 vacation days, and 45-50 hours of waiting on a bench in a depressing 4 storied cinderblock, I finally have a Japanese Driver's License at long last. Am I bitter and resentful? NOT A BIT.

Now, many of my longtime friends and family already know that I purchased a car my first year in Japan and was cruising around the rice fields to the castles, hot spring resorts, and ski areas. Less of you probably know how all that came to an abrupt halt my second year, when Japanese law required the procurement of a Japanese license.

I postponed and procrastinated for a variety of reasons, including my extremely busy schedule, my nature of procrastination, problems identifying and aquiring the proper documents, and the inability to find time off work to go get it. A trip to the "menko centaa (center)" from Koriyama involves an hourlong bus or train trip, followed by another half hour on a bus in the city of Fukushima. The center in Koriyama gives licenses to Japanese people, but foreigners have to travel an hour away (for some people in my prefecture, it can be over 3 hours to this city). Am I resentful of the double standard? NOT A BIT!

My first trip to the Menko Centaa took place sometime in April. I arrived right on schedule before 8:30 AM in the appropriate office. I had carefully gathered all the necessary documents the previous night, double checking after hearing all the horror stories about the "menko centaa." I had taken 4 hours of driving lessons the previous week, at a total cost of approximately 50 USD per hour. Much to my charign, what should have been a day of relatively mild bureaucratic torture was cut short at approximately 9:30, by their realization that my passport was issued in Tokyo. Because my passport was issued in Tokyo (Due to losing the original while in transit from Thailand), and my American DL is from Arizona, they had no way of determining if I had ever actually lived and driven in Arizona. I finally was able to prove that I had lived in Arizona, but only after a lot of headaches. Am I bitter and resentful of such anal retentive civil service employees? NOT AT ALL!

I returned the second time, again with all my documents in tow (including a few new ones to prove I lived in Arizona). They gave me a questionaire about my American license. How many questions were on your driving test? Was it multiple choice or true-false? How many options were there on the multiple choice? How long was the driving test? Was it on a closed course or public roads? As I hadn't taken the driving test in the USA since I was 15, I made stuff up that sounded about right. Then this woman came out and said they were going to check with the Arizona DMV. They said if I wasn't completely accurate, that they would refuse me my license. She wasn't real nice about it either.

This is the point when I began to stop taking them seriously, as I knew she had no means by which to corroborate my claims on that particular day. She could barely read the English on the American documents I provided, and even if she did reach anyone over the phone at the Arizona DMV at 8:30 PM on Sunday night, she couldn't speak much English either. And if they did have a Japanese database with detailed information on American Driver's license Tests, why were they going to the trouble of asking me all these questions? Did I take umbrage at this obviously empty threat on the part of the Menko Centaa Nazi Woman? No, not me!

From the beginning, they were always quite cantankerous with me. I never once sensed that these people felt they were government workers funded with public tax dollars and were required to serve the public. It was more like they were trying to be an obstacle. One critical democratic concept that appears to be lacking in Japan (or at least far less developed) is the idea that government exists to serve the people. Believe it or not, the experiences and interactions that take place at an American DMV are far more pleasant as the customer service mindset exists. Did I make negative comparisons between my current situation and dealing with the fantastic efficiency and delightful amiability of Arizona's fine government instutions? Me? No Way!

After another hour and a half of waiting, they came out again and told me that I would not be able to get a license without ANOTHER document from the Arizona DMV. They couldn't explain what this required document actually was or its purpose. This was not due to my still limited Japanese, but rather their lack of specificity. (Another American was there with his Japanese girlfriend to help translate when I needed help.) They could only say that because my license says "Under 21 until..." that I require SOMETHING from the Arizona Motor Vehicles Department!

Prior to this second visit, I had several Japanese friends and colleages familiar with the government call and clarify everything about all the documents ( they apparently require far more documentation and paperwork than they officially advertise). We had double and triple checked with everyone in the menko centaa over the phone, and the consensus (over the phone) was that I had all the necessary documents. They even knew my name before I got there. Now this same woman and another man was telling me otherwise. Having fought the urge to strangle this woman several times, I was about to snap. In the paraphrased words of William Blake, "my wrath did grow".

I've been in Japan long enough to know that showing emotion, especially anger, is rarely, if ever acceptable. This is one reason that I dreaded going to the menko centaa, as I was afraid it would bring about the absolute worst in me. And it did. While I never exploded in anger, I was never proud of the way I conducted myself. And while I exersized as much restraint as I could, everyone could plainly see my exasperation, frustration and anger, which probably didn't help my case. I thought about my character, primarily my ability to deal with mild adversity. In the grand scheme of things, it was extremely trying, but ultimately not something worth getting angry over. Yes, it was a lot of time and money, but ultimately, life would go on just fine without a license.

Fortunately before I did anything really stupid, I demanded to see their boss. I'm glad I did this because he came out and quickly reviewed everything and said it was all OK! There was no need for unspecified documents from Arizona! The two subordinate civil servants were wrong, and I was right! I looked at them and asked them why they were asking me for these documents, and then double checked with their boss, to make sure there was no misunderstanding. Smart people please correct me if I'm wrong, but I was only able to draw two logical conclusions from this encounter: 1. The underlings were actively decieving me and countering my efforts. 2. The underlings were incompetent, and their propensity for ineptitude was costing me a lot of time and money. The underlings looked at me sheepishly and quickly apologized as their supervisor went back into the office. Do I resent having to judge the professionalism of Japanese government workers through such infuriating deductive reasoning? NO, I'M GONNA BE POSITIVE!

Following this episode, the Nazi woman handling my case changed completely. Whereas she was previously an antagonistic obstacle, actively hindering my efforts at aquiring a license (or at the very least appearing to do so), she quickly turned into my willing ally, being helpful and curteous. And while I failed the test that day, she was kind and at least appeared genuinely sympathetic. During my next two trips she was disturbingly friendly, almost a completely different person, even giving me tips about the test and smiling and making small talk. Its a shame too, because she was very tall and actually very pretty. Picture a former model turned shrewish amazon battle-ax in a cheezy martial arts flick. Unfortuately, my opinion of her was already sealed.

I got to take the test that day, but I failed. I had to take the test 5 times. You can only take the test once a day. You MUST wait around a minimum of 3 hours before you take it. Actually you must wait 4-5 hours the first time, largely because they give you the driving history interview, vision test, and a 10 minute written test. None of those things should take longer than 40 minutes. Technically I only had to wait two hours before the second test, but due to train schedules, I wound up waiting there 3. You MUST wait a minimum of 2 hours for your results. Then you learn that you must come back another day. Canadians, British, Australians and most European nationalities do not have to take this 10 minute driving test. Am I resentful about this double standard? NOT AT ALL! (This is largely because the USA doesn't offer a simple transfer to Japanese drivers coming to America, so everybody write your Senators RIGHT NOW!)

The driving test is ridiculous. It has little bearing on driving safely (I actually wonder if a few of the things they want you to do aren't more dangerous) but is more about your ability to follow a script. I think I could have passed it after the second or third time, were it not for the fact that I was taking the test with a clutch (because that's what my car has). With the clutch, they told me I failed because I was in the wrong gear (either one gear too high or one gear too low on turns or the long straight section of the test (where I was supposed to be in 5th gear instead of fourth, even though the length and speed don't really justify it). They are also finicky about how "smooth" you are, whether its a clutch or automatic. The test evaluators will make a big dramatic show of rocking back and forth in the passenger seat if you aren't "smooth." Its pathetic drama, and you can almost taste the puke in your mouth when he does it.

Anyways, I've got a licence again now, and I drove up to the mountains this weekend and did some off roading. Off roading is fun when your car is a 2 door 600 cc Suzuki Alto that could fit in the back end of some American SUVs. The bitter aftertaste of my time at the menko centaa is fading, just as the piquancy of vomit and bile slowly disappears with a glass of water.

If you want to learn more about the driving test, read Ryan's website on the side. He describes the test in detail.

Alison Yeardley in the Race for the Cure on Saturday!

I just heard from my old friend Alison Yeardley recently! She is British, but living in Houston Texas now and is working at a British Primary School for all the pint sized English expats. Those of you who do know Alison will attest to the fact that she is one of the most cheerful, happy, generous, and kind people you will ever have the privilege of meeting.

I was lucky enough to meet Alison years ago (Summer of 2002) where we spent the summer working for YMCA Camp Marston in Julian California. She always has a smile on her face and has the unique ability to cheer up even the grouchiest amongst us. She is outgoing, fun loving and eternally optomistic. I have never heard her say anything that wasn't positive, funny, or encouraging. I can say with authority that she brought the very best out in everyone around her.

She also came and briefly visited me the following summer when I was working at Bright Angel Lodge in the Grand Canyon. And unfortunately, that is the last time I have seen her. But I will see her again. In the first picture she is on the right. I don't have as many of the Camp Marston scans as I thought I did.

Anyways, the reason I'm writing about her now is that she is running in the Susan G. Komen Breast Cancer Foundation's Race for the Cure and needs our support. All readers of this blog are hereby obligated to contribute money to her cause! In her own words, "

Dear Friends and Family,

I recently accepted the challenge to raise funds to support the Komen Houston Race for the Cure on September 30, 2006 in the fight against breast cancer. One in seven women will be stricken with breast cancer in her lifetime and the more we raise, the more the Komen Houston Affiliate of the Susan G. Komen Breast Cancer Foundation can give back to fund vital breast cancer education, screening and treatment programs in our own community and support the national search for a cure.

Please join me in the fight by pledging in support of my
participation in the Race or contributing generously to Komen Houston. Your tax-deductible contribution will fund innovative outreach and awareness programs for medically underserved communities in Houston and national breast cancer research. It is faster and easier than ever to support this great cause - you can make a donation online by simply clicking on the link at the bottom of this message. If you would prefer, you can also send your tax-deductible contribution to the address listed below. Whatever you can give will help! I truly appreciate your support and will keep you posted on my progress.

Thank you so much for your time and support in the fight against breast cancer! Every step counts!"

I'm not sure if those were her exact words or some website editor in Houston, but either way, she needs our help. So if you can, please contribute to her cause. This is her site for the race. You can contribute at her site. She'll be grateful for anything you can do to help. In the picture she is the one on the right. I'll have to ask her for a better picture, because I never finished all those scans.

Kamakura and the Daibutsu

Last weekend, I went to Kamakura, which is just South of Tokyo. Being famous for hundreds of temples, shrines, and a large Buddha, Kamakura is on the list of places to see if you live in Japan. I visited a number of famous sites there, including a bamboo forest, several famous temples and shrines, and the famous Daibutsu statue. The statue wasn't as big as I thought it would be, although it was quite large.

I found the entire area to be quite charming. I visited the town with my friend Erika, whom I met previously in Australia. She showed me around and read Chinese characters I don't know.

One shrine I recall particularly well, and Erika explained what several of the dieties represented. Perched atop a steep hill, we climbed a set of moss covered steps to reach the top. We removed our shoes and stepped in, where the statues representing various dieties were arranged. One statue she explained, was dedicated to children who died in miscarriage. Numerous toys and baby formula lay piled near the shrine, offerings from women remembering their deceased children. At another statue, you could pay 300 yen (3 USD) and write your wish on a thin slice of balsa wood. When enough sticks are accumulated, priests will burn them as an offering.

Overall, the trip was great, despite being somewhat short. The only real problem was the rain! Clouds threatened rain all morning, and followed through with the threat for most of the afternoon. What a drag! I still had fun though.

週末は鎌倉へ行きました。鎌倉の大仏を行って見ました。私の友達と一緒に行きました。行ったときに、インドのカリー食べました。とても辛かった。で私の友達は食べることができなかった。　日曜日神社と寺院と大仏に行ってきました。竹の森をはじめて見ました。竹は高かったです。午後は雨でした。　４月からこれで四回傘を買ったことがあります。それから私たちはヤキニクを食べました。　本格的な韓国のレストランですのでペヨンジュンの写真がありました。

The Befuddled Old Coin Dealer

Well, my Japanese Numismatic adventure began with a splash! I took the local train from my city south to the rustic little abode of Shirakawa (picture Little Rock with terraced rice fields). Armed with my tiny little Internet Map print-out with an address I couldn't read, I set out from the train station on foot. I quickly reached the post office that should have been 5-10 meters away, but could find no obvious coin dealer.

I asked some man in a barber-shop where the place was, and he told me it was the next block just behind me (a street which was conveniently deleted from my print-out). He told me to ask for a "matsuda san." After going over there however, I noticed no coin business in the location he mentioned, only another barbershop. There was a third hair salon with a couple women in it and I asked again, thinking I must have forgotten my Japanese in Italy. She however, confirmed that Matsuda-san lived there, and told me to ring him.

Matsuda-san's barbershop looked closed, but I rang anyways, only to have some old man answer the door, drop his jaw and gasp. Under his breath I caught him utter a faint, "gaijinne! (Isn't it a foreigner!). He quickly came to his senses, despite being in the presence of a pasty white guy 20 centimeters taller than he. He enthusiastically invited me in after I asked if he was indeed the coin dealer I had been seeking.

The "coin-dealer" as his business was advertised on the internet, was actually about 70 percent barbershop, with a glass retail counter on the back wall for his coins. He ran into the back room as I perused his collection. He came back out with some tea, and quickly asked where I was from. After learning that I was American, he smiled and eagerly showed me a whole leather album full of nothing but Eisenhower Dollars. After politely listening to him talk exitedly about Eisenhower Dollars, I asked about some older Japanese coins, but he kept showing me Dwight Eisenhower and State Quarters.

For whatever reason, he couldn't seem to fathom that I would have any interest at all in Japanese coins. I finally got him to show me some Meiji Silver 1 Yen pieces, which were quite nice. I finally bought one that dates to 1904 for about 4000 yen, or about 35 US dollars. I also bought the Japanese version of the "Red Book" which is the book that lists all the coins ever made in Japan.

For those of you who don't know, Japan does not officially count years from the birth of Christ, but rather, the number of years of the current reign of the Emperor. Thus, the current year is not 2006, but Heisei 18, and this is what appears on all the coins. When a new Emperor takes the throne, it starts at 1 again. So the coins to look for in circulation now, are ones from Showa 64, which is when the previous Emperor died shortly after the start of the new year. Because of this, very few Showa 64 coins were made, as most of the coins that year marked the beginning of the Heisei reign. So if you find one in circulation, you can count yourself lucky.

The Silver 1 Yen coin I bought dates to 1904 and features a cool looking dragon on one side. Its about the size of the old American Silver Dollars.

Matsuda san was a very sweet and generous old man. In light of his hospitality and charming disposition, I'm sorry to say I wasn't terribly impressed with his collection. Things were VERY disorganized, and often not properly stored. The man also had very poor eyesight. After misplacing his glasses on the counter, I had to give them back to him during his, "help I can't find my glasses!" fit. I certainly wasn't going to let him cut my hair or give me a shave.

Another thing about Shirakawa, they have about 2 barbershops or hair salons on every block! I have never seen so many barbershops in my life! What's up with all the barbershops?

Coin Collecting & Kamakura

Today, I'm going to Shirakawa, which lies between my town and Tokyo. After considerable and exhaustive research, I have located a store that sells Japanese coins! Only a dork like myself could ever possibly get so excited about such a thing. I'm interested in adding some Japanese coins to my collection.

Being the eccentric nerd that I am, I collect coins from time to time, primarily American coins including Lincoln Cents, Indian Head Cents, and Walking Liberty Half Dollars. Made in America in the 1930's and 1940's, the Walking Liberty Half Dollars feature two of the coolest designs I have ever seen on a coin. The "Walkers" are my absolute favorites, and are the most beautiful coins I have ever seen to date. See the picture. There is a French 5 Franc coin with a similar design that dates from the mid-seventies. I have a few of those as well. Don't quote me on the dates.

I don't collect terribly rare and valuable coins so much. The only notable pieces I have are some nice "Walkers" in very fine and slightly better conditions. I mostly collect what I find in circulation. In the USA, the State Quarters are keeping myself and other collecters plenty busy. But I'm having more fun collecting while I travel. I visited a dealer in Australia and found some interesting Australian and British Coins. I bought a 1981 commemorating the marriage of Prince Charles and Diana!

On the Continent, My father and my friends Pat and Heike will attest to my endless search for European Coins. According to my friend Pat, the Euro coins are all designed and issued by each European Country. Each country gets to issue their own designs, so there should be dozens (hundreds?) of varieties to find. On the Italian coins, there were designs of Leonardo and the Colluseum. In Belgium there were designs of the Belgian monarch and the Belgian Atomium, a large steel structure that looks like a iron crystal molecule. A Spanish coin I found has Cervantes' portrait on one side, etc.

This will be my first visit to a Japanese Coin Dealer, so we'll see what I can find. There are a few very 500 Yen peices commemorating the Nagano Winter Olympics floating around, but I haven't found one in a condition worth keeping.

With Monday being a Japanese National Holiday, I also intend to go down to Kamakura for the 3 day weekend. Kamakura is famous for an abundance of shrines and temples, as well as a large Daibutsu, or Japanese Buddha. I will report about it in my next update, so stay tuned!

This Week's Caption Contest

Hey Everyone! Be sure to participate in this week's caption contest, otherwise, it will go to Skilz every week!

You all know the rules:

1. Everything stays under PG-13

2. Participation is mandatory for readers of this blog.